The Pattern
We are not Adam and Eve, we were born in sin and we live in the 21st century and the Garden is not perfect. We don’t have the ability to remember what it was like before the fall to guide our actions. But we do have the book to remind us what to do. It is filled with examples for us to follow or at least to meditate on the principles shown.
To begin with we need to train our expectations along the lines that God requires.
This is the first problem as society tries to pull us away every time. If we know that the goal of marriage is to Glorify Him, we can work towards the right attitude to it. If we know that the purpose of marriage is to help each other, to avoid fornication and to raise Godly children, then we can aim at preparing ourselves for those expectations.
If we understand these things before we get married then we can save ourselves a lot of trouble and if our intended spouse also understands that, then we stand a good chance of a good start.
Scripture warns us not to marry unbelievers and many have made the mistake of settling for someone who says they are a Christian, a churchgoer! That is not the same as a believer. You need to check what they believe! (2 Cor:6.14)
What about marrying someone from a different culture? Some think the bible teaches us not to.
Isaac married someone from his own extended family, as did Jacob. But Moses permitted men to choose wives from among the peoples they conquered as a general rule.
God specifically told them not to from specific groups but generally it wasn’t a problem. Although the background understanding is that the woman was completely under the husbands control and she could not therefore change his ways from what God required. She was grateful to be alive and not to be a slave who had no rights at all. As a wife, she could only be abused by one man and the Torah put limits on that. (De:21. )
Dating as it occurs in the modern world is not recommended. It seems to be a form of entertainment rather than a sensible way to find a life partner.
Where is the best place to find a life partner? Well he or she will probably be found where you are, doing what you do. Many these days do not know where they are going and so cannot tell who they need to help them get there.
David Livingston met his wife, the daughter of a missionary, in
You should not be looking for a partner until you are ready to marry one.
When are you ready?
Well that is complicated these days. Some say that 16 is ok and some say get a job first, still others say wait until you have finished having fun, say 27!
Jewish tradition holds that a boy is ready when he is 13 years old (Bar Mitzvah) and a girl can marry at 12 so long as she has breasts. They are usually older than that as the "man" must get a house for his wife and some experience is valuable.
The Song of Solomon: 8.8 has a person lamenting for their sister who cannot marry because she has no breasts. Presumably because she could not keep her husband happy as even small breasts can provide enough milk to feed a baby.
We laugh at the absurdity of marrying at that young age in our enlightened societies and in the next breath moan under the weight of realization that the unwanted teenage pregnancy rate is still rising. Romeo and Juliet were said to have been 16 and 13 years old respectively.
Of course now we have to live within the law of the country we are in and my country claims 16 –18 years is the minimum. It also limits each man to one wife although the bible doesn’t preclude polygamy. Jews can have as many wives as a man can keep happy, and as long as the law allows.
Keeping a wife happy required 3 things; food, clothing and regular sex. (Ketubah) A man would have to be very virile to have several wives and very rich. Which brings us to another point. It would be best for a man to work as hard as he could to earn money and buy a house before he marries because after the children come its more difficult. That’s why many stories in the bible have men around 40 years old, marrying virgins (@ 15 yrs) They had to get something behind them and they had to marry a virgin.
The next thing we need is commitment. Those that God has joined, let no man put asunder! If you are sure that the person you intend to marry is God’s choice for you, then you cannot ever separate. If you both realize this then you have a great strength to help you through difficult times.
It’s important to understand that marriage is a covenant between two people and God. The covenant is a binding agreement, sealed by the blood, (of a virgin) until death and anyone who breaks the covenant, calls death upon themselves. The couple vow by God to keep their marriage promises as long as they live. (note that the incidence of cancer is much higher among divorcees)
What are the marriage promises? We have just seen a brief version of the Jewish Ketubah. A man promises and writes that he will keep his wife fed and clothed and make love regularly to her and they write a monetary value of that agreement as insurance that he will abide by it.
The traditional Christian vows are similar but without a signed agreement (perhaps because the average person couldn’t read or write for many centuries)
(Groom) I, (Name), take you (Name), to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, honour and to cherish, till death do us part, or the Lord comes for His own, and hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.
(Bride) I, (Name), take you (Name), to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, honour and to obey, till death do us part, or the Lord comes for His own, and hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.
Notice the two vows of the man and woman are almost the same except where he says “cherish” and she says “obey”. Cherish means to care for look after and keep warm, to treat as important and worth valuing. (Pr:18.22) “He who finds a wife, finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord!”
Obey means just that, to act as if the husband is the captain and you must do what he says. Obedience begins when you do what you don’t want to because your authority asked you to. The Greek word used in the NT. “Hoopotasso” Is a military term and just like in the army, a subordinate should yield himself to a higher authority to aid progress and improve the consequences. Working together toward a greater goal!
This is one of the reasons the traditional vows are never heard anymore.
We worship freedom and equality but obedience smacks of slavery and oppression.
Freedom is seen as doing what you want rather than what you should and equality is seen as doing the same thing rather than having the same value.
Feminist mindsets attack this kind of writing without analyzing the consequences of it. We are all called to obey authority and the higher authority in this case is the husband, who has been given that authority by God. A wife who obeys her husband is obeying God and God will bless that and make the results better than even the husband could.
This is the source of the power of a “one flesh” union, where God gave them dominion over all the earth. Unity! (I give you authority, C.H.Kraft)
The husband rules and the wife follows his direction, helping suitably. Note that this does not make her less important or less valuable. God fixes her value as the same as her husbands’. Her job description however is different. There cannot be two captains in a unit.
This is one concept we can make a doctrine out of. It appears more than the necessary 2 or 3 times in scripture beginning in Genesis. And the apostle Paul wrote it in Corinthians, Ephesians and Colossians and Peter wrote it as well. There is no doubt that wifely obedience is important and necessary.
The word teaches us the authority is clearly given to husbands. The bible teacher Derrick Prince said that, “if a wife doesn’t submit to her husband, it’s nearly impossible for a husband to do his part”. Most women, as feminists rightly point out, are very capable people who can multitask and balance books etc. but that doesn’t mean they can be the leader of a marriage. It’s not their job! Unfortunately many men these days don’t do the job either and women often take up the slack to their chagrin and his. Many men raised with a feminist mindset don’t want to be leaders for fear of repercussions and an unwillingness to take responsibility. They are still men and still have the responsibility to lead but need a patient wife to give them space and opportunity to practice. Evangelist Billy Graham pointed out that: “the injunction for husbands to rule over their wives has never changed”.
Why did God make the man the leader; because Adam knew that God told them not to eat the fruit but Adam just stood their dumbly listening to his wife walking into the serpents trap and never said, “Wait a minute, God said…” Making him the leader was a punishment for not acting responsible. That was Adam’s sin. He was created first and spent some time in the garden learning all about life before Eve was brought forth. He was Eve's leader and teacher from the beginning but when it came to the test, he failed and said nothing!
The early church must have had a problem with women wanting to rule over their husbands because it was written so many times to the churches. I think one reason could have been that women were baptized as well as men! They were treated as spiritual equals in the church that was used to segregation, and began to forget their place in the home. A side note that in the Synagogue men and women were separated, the women had the box seats away from men’s line of vision and didn’t “have to” attend as a rule. This leads feminists to say “see, religion always oppresses women” , not understanding that a woman’s role as mother was considered more important than worship and women were free to worship as they felt they could where as men were compelled. The box seats, (best in the house) were to avoid distracting the men with their beauty and provide privacy for nursing.
Not repression but recognition of their value, even exaltation!
In recent times women have worshipped together with men and so its things like the cheque book that spirits of this world pick on as do religious sects. The latter say that the husband should control the money as he is the head, despite the fact that she is better at it!
I say that the finances should be handled, by the one that does it best, the husband still is the head regardless. As a man used to go out, collect food and bring it home for his wife to prepare and divide for the family, so he brings home the money for his wife to divide. I think it is an insecure man who needs to keep control of the money although sometimes he might be better at it. Do what is best!
Why can’t women rule their husbands? The first reason is because God said!
It seemed to be a punishment on women for the fall but looking at it practically, men cannot obey women! They have no natural ability to allow women to control them. They don’t listen! God made it that way. He has perfectly gifted men to lead for His purposes and perfectly gifted women to be 2 I.C. for His purposes. We can relax and know that His purposes will be fulfilled when we do His will.
Where brethren (Brother and sister, husband and wife) dwell together in unity, (same goals and cooperation) God commands a blessing!
Whether it was a curse or not, it is a command; Your husband will rule over you!
Obeying Gods commands brings blessing and not obeying brings a curse.
Now we need to shift this point beyond the bounds of man and wife. It’s not just your marital happiness at stake here. We are in a spiritual war.
The enemy spirits do not want women to obey their husbands because they know that their disobedience will neutralize a man’s effectiveness in building the Kingdom. Another reason why the word used for submit was military was to remind us that we are in a war. And to remind us that to win, we need to keep order of rank. Women are not slaves, they are second in command. In a husbands absence a wife has full control.
Correct submission to God given authority brings far reaching rewards to many. Couples who disobey God also teach their children to do the same. If we are to take back that which the enemy stole in the garden, we need to have order and self control and follow God’s directions.
He said, “Your husband shall rule over you!” And this rule is a vital key in winning the world back for God. That is why it is such a contentious issue.
What about this freedom in Christ? Paul wrote there is now no longer bond or free, all are free in Christ and all are slaves to Christ. Wives who submit to their husbands are free from responsibility and can relax mentally. This is another reason why it was common to marry a much older man. She could see his track record for sensible decision-making. Who can trust a teenage boy to make responsible decisions?
What happens when a wife refuses to obey her husband? I’ve already mentioned how hard it is for a husband to do a good job of being the leader, or even want to when the followers don’t follow, but there is also a penalty in the body. Deuteronomy 28 lists the blessings and curses that are activated by obedience and disobedience respectively. He said, “I will permit none of the diseases of
The word Honour means a kind of respect but with a slight difference.
You can give honour to someone you don’t know very well when you say they did something very well and you can honour your spouse in the same way, tell people how good they are at…(fill in the blank) You do not need to have great trust or respect for them to do this!
It’s a conscious act of the will to speak positively about your spouse.
This brings them honour and wives used to be divorced for breaking this vow. We all know that our spouse has some habits that we find annoying and maybe they even do some things we consider wrong but the word counsels us to speak positively, especially in marriage. Speaking positively about our spouse to someone else, in his or her hearing is the greatest form of encouragement and spurs them on to greater heights.
Billy Graham’s wife Ruth advised young women to not expect their husbands to do what only God can do for you. Your husband is not the source of all peace, security and joy. Those things come from God!
The word counsels men to be considerate towards their wives as the weaker sex. (1 Pet:3.7) Some men can forget their power over a woman, as they are in awe of their wife’s ability to communicate and multitask or whatever else he can’t do well, and then become belligerent or bitter towards them. We are warned that this will hinder our prayers. God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble! The prayer of a righteous man is powerful! Make sure you are righteous!
The traditional vows sometimes include the lines: “with my body I honour thee and all my worldly goods I bestow upon thee”. There is the line that covers the fact that you body belongs to your spouse and that your spouse is entitled to use of your property.
The letter to the church at
It begins with mutual submission to each other, then moves on to specifically caution wives to submit to their husbands (using the military term for submit) then goes on to liken the marriage to Christ and the church. A wife should submit to her husband as to Christ (who made him head) who sanctifies her by the washing of the word. This gives us a picture of Christ cleansing the church by His word. That is, when the church hears the word of God and does it, they are made holy. Likewise, when a wife hears her husband’s word and does it, she is sanctified. Included in this analogy is the understanding that the husband is sharing God’s word, for His word alone can cleanse.
This idea is backed up by Paul writing to the church in
Paul didn’t mean so much women keep silent but wives learn from (be in agreement with) your husbands.
This is all made much easier to bare when the husband loves his wife as much as himself.
Husbands are commanded to love their wives and to not be bitter against them. Wives have great power to hurt a man, as they can understand him and find his weak spots emotionally and as some do, their husbands become bitter and either angry or depressed, both of which lead to a breakdown in communication and dissatisfaction on both sides. They then either attack their wife verbally or physically or retreat to the club or just work longer hours to avoid going home. Neglect is one of the greatest causes of divorce in recent times.
It behoves a husband to work to become more Christ-like as very few women would attack a husband who was like Christ, a perfect balance of power and authority with grace and humility and wisdom, none would dare stand against him.
The next part of the verse, “And sacrificed Himself for it”, has been interpreted by some to mean that a husband should give up himself for his wife. While we are all called to a life of sacrifice and a husband must work to keep his family, the verse is actually alluding to Christ’s one time death for all and the Greek word holds the connotation that it cannot be repeated. Christ was the only one capable of that sacrifice.
A wholehearted understanding that this format is the beginning of a strong and lifelong marriage will put any couple on a good foundation.
Many marriages these days do not begin like this and fall short of the glory of God that our marriages are supposed to be heralding. If we begin as God intended, then we are able to be sustained by God to the end.
All the promises of God are…. Conditional.
If you…. Then I’ll …. We must fulfill the conditions to get the blessing. God is gracious and compassionate and slow to anger and sometimes He lets us off the hook, especially when we are new in the faith, but usually He lets us take the consequences for our actions.
So now we need to summarize our findings and make a list of dos.
The Word of God holds the keys to successful marriage and so it should since God wrote it and God designed marriage. Genesis always holds the keys to the state of mankind, being the beginning of all things. The spirit of this world always tries to divert people from following the word of God. Correct application of the rules of marriage will bring benefit not only to the couple but also to their friends and relatives, children and descendants, influencing a large part of their society.
The POWER
Some people who have read the preceding chapters will now be feeling crushed by the weight of the knowledge of what to do to grow their marriages. Moses felt the same as he stood before the burning bush and God told him to go and set the people of
Later he said to God, “If you don’t go with us, we will not go”. The power to do His will comes through His presence with us. “With God, all things are possible”. We need to make sure we are not just doing His will but also that we are doing it, with Him! Adam and Eve did not marry alone, God was there with them as the best man and the father of the bride and He would walk with them in the cool of the evening and talk about whatever they needed to understand. He still walks with us by His Holy Spirit.
He wants us to fulfill each other’s needs, the needs that were actually created by Him in the garden when He took Eve from Adam’s side and separated them physically. He created our need for one-ness by making us two. We get our needs met by giving to each other (not taking from) what the other needs.
In his book, “Becoming one with your mate” Dr Larry Crabb tells us that our need for intimacy is legitimate and we should not be ashamed of it but that sometimes our feelings prevent us from realizing the truth; in Christ we have all sufficiency. One of the main purposes of our marriage is so that our spouse can help us to “feel” as fulfilled as Christ has made available to us. That is one of the ways we glorify Him as we demonstrate the wonderful abundant life He gave us through our marriage.
However, the easiest thing for us to do is forget the giver and look to the given. We begin to then expect our spouse to fulfill our needs (not just help us feel fulfilled) and wait for them to provide something. When we look to them for our need we give them (an imperfect fallen being) the power to help, but more likely hurt and disappoint us.
They have the power to deny our needs and reject us. We then react or recoil with fear or anger instead of love. When we work toward giving to our spouse, out of love made available by God, then we are building from strength instead of seeking fulfillment.
An insecure wife questions her husband (to test whether he still loves her) and he reacts with anger or feigned indifference to the questioning as he recognizes the lack of trust. She then feels rejected and so pursues it further, and the couple spiral downwards towards a hopeless no win situation that ends with either a numb stalemate or divorce. Sometimes a spouse may just try to pretend nothing has happened and try again later but this is also doomed to failure. The only way back up is through repentance and a determination to obey God.
How can a man love his wife when he feels emotionally empty? How can a woman give to her husband when she feels neglected? The apostle Paul gives us the answers in the books of Ephesians and Corinthians. We are not working on marriage just for our own sakes alone but to bring glory to God. When it is hard work, we remember the goal is not just for ourselves. He gives us the power by the reason of the goal. And He gives us a specific order to begin working by. Wives obey your husbands in all things is the first instruction to the couple. When a woman obeys her husband (despite his apparent lack of love toward her) her willingness to be humble and try, unlocks his heart and enables him to begin moving towards ministering to her. The second instruction is to him (the first person in order of authority) to love (despite his feelings) and to not be bitter (because of her lack of respect) which then enables him to earn her respect by showing love to her (as she knows she doesn’t deserve it) just like Christ who loved the church and gave Himself for it despite the fact that they were weak sinners who let Him down. The result is both are blessed beyond expectations, knowing that only God could have designed such a wonderful system. Without understanding that this is God’s design, the burden of obedience is crushing, but with God, all things are possible. Without Him the fear of failure rules our hearts. With Him, the faith for fulfillment strengthens us to victory over fear and to see the fruit as we step out and do the word.
Such a system enables a couple to spiral upwards getting higher and higher until a state of near heaven on earth is achieved, as much as is possible under the guidance of our own faith and belief. According to your faith be it! When we step out in faith, there is an interval of time when we see no result as He steps back to wait and see if we are truly committed in faith or just trying another method. The time lagg could be anywhere from a few seconds to a few years but if we truly believe Him, we will see the desired result.
God has not withheld any good thing from us even when we were sinners He sent His Son to die for us, so why should we then withhold from our mate?
Our lives have the feeling of security and significance, meaning and value when we work with God to give each other what they feel they need. The power to overcome rejection comes from the knowledge that He will never leave us or forsake us. The power to overcome fear of the unknown is in the realization that He knows everything. The power to overcome fear of lack is in the knowledge that He became poor so that we could be rich. We are free to serve because He came to serve us and free to love without restraint because He first loved us. This is the Gospel of Jesus Christ (the good news) and the power to live a redeemed life. With Him , all things are possible; abide in Him.
Mrk 4: 21 And He was saying to them, "A lamp is not brought to be put under a basket, is it, or under a bed? Is it not brought to be put on the lampstand? 22 "For nothing is hidden, except to be revealed; nor has anything been secret, but that it would come to light. 23 "If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear." 24 And He was saying to them, "Take care what you listen to. By your standard of measure it will be measured to you; and more will be given you besides. 25 "For whoever has, to him more shall be given; and whoever does not have, even what he has shall be taken away from him."
Amos 3:3. How can two walk together unless they be agreed?
Mathew …. A house divided against itself cannot stand.
1Co 6:18 -
1Co 7:2 - Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
1Co 10:8 - Neither let us commit fornication , as some of them committed , and fell in one day three and twenty thousand.
1Ti 5:14 -Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach;
Prov: 18. 22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
So. 8. We have a little sister, and she has no breasts. What shall we do for our sister, on the day when she is spoken for?
9 If she is a wall, we will build upon her a battlement of silver; but if she is a door, we will enclose her with boards of cedar.
10 I was a wall, and my breasts were like towers; then I was in his eyes as one who brings peace.
2Co 6:14 - Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?
Ge 17:13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.
Eph 6:12 - For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Ex 21:10 If he takes another wife, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marriage rights.
Ex 22:16 "If a man entices a virgin who is not betrothed, and lies with her, he shall surely pay the bride-price for her to be his wife.
1Co 6:9 - Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals,
1Ti 1:10 - and immoral men and homosexuals and kidnappers and liars and perjurers, and whatever * else is contrary to sound teaching,
But we know that the Law is good, if one uses it lawfully, realizing the fact that law is not made for a righteous person, but for those who are lawless and rebellious, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers and immoral men and homosexuals and kidnappers and liars and perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound teaching, according to the glorious gospel of the blessed God, with which I have been entrusted.
Le 20:10 - "The man who commits adultery with another man's wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor's wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.
Le 21:14 - A widow or a divorced woman or a defiled woman or a harlot--these he shall not marry; but he shall take a virgin of his own people as wife.
De 21:11 - and you see among the captives a beautiful woman, and desire her and would take her for your wife,
De 21:13 - She shall put off the clothes of her captivity, remain in your house, and mourn her father and her mother a full month; after that you may go in to her and be her husband, and she shall be your wife.
De 24: 1 "When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, 2when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man's wife, 3if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, 4then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the LORD, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
Col 3:18 - Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
Heb 13:17 - Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.
Jas 4: 6 But he gives more grace; therefore it says, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble." 7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
1Pe 3:1 - Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
1Pe 3:6 - just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.
1Pe 3:7 - Likewise you husbands, live considerately with your wives, bestowing honor on the woman as the weaker sex, since you are joint heirs of the grace of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered.
21. Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. 22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
1Pe 2:13 - Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord's sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme;
1Pe 5:5 - Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.
Mt 5:28 - But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge
Gen 39:12 - And she caught him by his garment, saying, Lie with me: and he left his garment in her hand, and fled, and got him out.
Mal 2:15 -And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.
1Ti 2:15 -But women will be preserved through the bearing of children if they continue in faith and love and sanctity with self-restraint.
1Ti 3:12 -Deacons must be husbands of only one wife, and good managers of their children and their own households.
1Ti 5:4 -but if any widow has children or grandchildren, they must first learn to practice piety in regard to their own family and to make some return to their parents; for this is acceptable in the sight of God.
1Ti 5:14 -Therefore, I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house, and give the enemy no occasion for reproach;
1 Cor ;14. 34 The women are to keep silent in the churches; for they are not permitted to speak, but are to subject themselves, just as the Law also says. 35 If they desire to learn anything, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is improper for a woman to speak in church. 36 Was it from you that the word of God first went forth? Or has it come to you only?
Tit. 2:3. Likewise, tell the older women to be reverent in behavior, not to be slanderers or slaves to drink; they are to teach what is good, 4so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5to be self-controlled, chaste, good managers of the household, kind, being submissive to their husbands, so that the word of God may not be discredited.
Heb 2: 12 saying, "I WILL PROCLAIM YOUR NAME TO MY BRETHREN, IN THE MIDST OF THE CONGREGATION I WILL SING YOUR PRAISE." 13 And again, "I WILL PUT MY TRUST IN HIM." And again, "BEHOLD , I AND THE CHILDREN WHOM GOD HAS GIVEN ME."
Psalms
1Co 7:11 -But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
1Co 7:5 -Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so * that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
So 2:3 - "Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, So is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, And his fruit was sweet to my taste.
So 2:16 - "My beloved is mine, and I am his; He pastures his flock among the lilies.
So 5:16 - "His mouth is full of sweetness. And he is wholly desirable. This is my beloved and this is my friend, O daughters of
22:9 -
Yet You are He who brought me forth from the womb; You made me trust {when} upon my mother's breasts.
Luke. 6: 38 Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.
Ps 78:5 - For he established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children:
Ps 127:3 - Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
Ps 127:4 - As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.
Ps 128:3 - Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table.
Ps 132:12 - If thy children will keep my covenant and my testimony that I shall teach them, their children shall also sit upon thy throne for evermore.
Ps 37:25 - I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.
10:3 -The LORD will not suffer the soul of the righteous to famish: but he casteth away the substance of the wicked.
John 10:10. I have come that you may have life and that to the full.
Ge 49:25 - Even by the God of thy father, who shall help thee; and by the Almighty, who shall bless thee with blessings of heaven above, blessings of the deep that lieth under, blessings of the breasts, and of the womb:
Ge 21:7 - And she said, "Who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would suckle children? Yet I have borne him a son in his old age."
Prov. 5:15. Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well.
16 Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets?
17 Let them be for yourself alone, and not for sharing with strangers.
18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
19 a lovely deer, a graceful doe. May her breasts satisfy you at all times; may you be intoxicated always by her love.
20 Why should you be intoxicated, my son, by another woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress?
Pr. 7: .. The Lord hates … those who stir up strife in families.
Pr 13:24 - He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
Pr 19:13 A foolish son is the calamity of his father: and the contentions of a wife are a continual dropping.
14. House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.
15. Slothfulness casteth into a deep sleep; and an idle soul shall suffer hunger.
16. He that keepeth the commandment keepeth his own soul; but he that despiseth his ways shall die.
17. He that hath pity upon the poor lendeth unto the LORD; and that which he hath given will he pay him again.
18. Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.
De: 21. 18 "If any man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father or his mother, and when they chastise him, he will not even listen to them, 19 then his father and mother shall seize him, and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gateway of his hometown. 20 "They shall say to the elders of his city, `This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey us, he is a glutton and a drunkard.' 21 "Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death; so you shall remove the evil from your midst, and all Israel will hear of it and fear.
Pr 22:6 - Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it.
Ge 17:9 - And God said to Abraham, "As for you, you shall keep my covenant, you and your descendants after you throughout their generations.
Ge 18:19 - No, for I have chosen him, that he may charge his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing righteousness and justice; so that the LORD may bring to Abraham what he has promised him."
Ge 26:5 - because Abraham obeyed my voice and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws."
Ex 15:26 - And He said, "If you will give earnest heed to the voice of the LORD your God, and do what is right in His sight, and give ear to His commandments, and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have put on the Egyptians; for I, the LORD, am your healer."
De 7:15 - "The LORD will remove from you all sickness; and He will not put on you any of the harmful diseases of
DE:28. 1 "Now it shall be, if you diligently obey the LORD your God, being careful to do all His commandments which I command you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. 2 "All these blessings will come upon you and overtake you if you obey the LORD your God:
3 "Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the country.
4 "Blessed shall be the offspring of your body and the produce of your ground and the offspring of your beasts, the increase of your herd and the young of your flock.
5 "Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.
6 "Blessed shall you be when you come in, and blessed shall you be when you go out.
7 "The LORD shall cause your enemies who rise up against you to be defeated before you; they will come out against you one way and will flee before you seven ways. 8 "The LORD will command the blessing upon you in your barns and in all that you put your hand to, and He will bless you in the land which the LORD your God gives you. 9 "The LORD will establish you as a holy people to Himself, as He swore to you, if you keep the commandments of the LORD your God and walk in His ways. 10 "So all the peoples of the earth will see that you are called by the name of the LORD, and they will be afraid of you. 11 "The LORD will make you abound in prosperity, in the offspring of your body and in the offspring of your beast and in the produce of your ground, in the land which the LORD swore to your fathers to give you. 12 "The LORD will open for you His good storehouse, the heavens, to give rain to your land in its season and to bless all the work of your hand; and you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow. 13 "The LORD will make you the head and not the tail, and you only will be above, and you will not be underneath, if you listen to the commandments of the LORD your God, which I charge you today, to observe them carefully, 14 and do not turn aside from any of the words which I command you today, to the right or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them.
Consequences of Disobedience
15 "But it shall come about, if you do not obey the LORD your God, to observe to do all His commandments and His statutes with which I charge you today, that all these curses will come upon you and overtake you:
16 "Cursed shall you be in the city, and cursed shall you be in the country.
17 "Cursed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl.
18 "Cursed shall be the offspring of your body and the produce of your ground, the increase of your herd and the young of your flock.
19 "Cursed shall you be when you come in, and cursed shall you be when you go out.
20 "The LORD will send upon you curses, confusion, and rebuke, in all you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and until you perish quickly, on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken Me. 21 "The LORD will make the pestilence cling to you until He has consumed you from the land where you are entering to possess it. 22 "The LORD will smite you with consumption and with fever and with inflammation and with fiery heat and with the sword and with blight and with mildew, and they will pursue you until you perish. 23 "The heaven which is over your head shall be bronze, and the earth which is under you, iron. 24 "The LORD will make the rain of your land powder and dust; from heaven it shall come down on you until you are destroyed.
25 "The LORD shall cause you to be defeated before your enemies; you will go out one way against them, but you will flee seven ways before them, and you will be an example of terror to all the kingdoms of the earth. 26 "Your carcasses will be food to all birds of the sky and to the beasts of the earth, and there will be no one to frighten them away.
27 "The LORD will smite you with the boils of
38 "You shall bring out much seed to the field but you will gather in little, for the locust will consume it. 39 "You shall plant and cultivate vineyards, but you will neither drink of the wine nor gather the grapes, for the worm will devour them. 40 "You shall have olive trees throughout your territory but you will not anoint yourself with the oil, for your olives will drop off. 41 "You shall have sons and daughters but they will not be yours, for they will go into captivity. 42 "The cricket shall possess all your trees and the produce of your ground. 43 "The alien who is among you shall rise above you higher and higher, but you will go down lower and lower. 44 "He shall lend to you, but you will not lend to him; he shall be the head, and you will be the tail.
45 "So all these curses shall come on you and pursue you and overtake you until you are destroyed, because you would not obey the LORD your God by keeping His commandments and His statutes which He commanded you. 46 "They shall become a sign and a wonder on you and your descendants forever.
Isa 3:4 -And I will make mere lads their princes, And capricious children will rule over them,
Isa 3:12 -O My people! Their oppressors are children, And women rule over them. O My people! Those who guide you lead you astray And confuse the direction of your paths.
Pr 29:18 -Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.
Pr 29:17. Discipline your children, and they will give you rest; they will give delight to your heart.
Da 11:32 -And such as do wickedly against the covenant shall he corrupt by flatteries: but the people that do know their God shall be strong, and do exploits.
Pr 13:22 -A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
Mt 6:24 No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.
Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.
Re 19:7 Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready
How to become one with your mate, Lawrence J. Crabb jnr
Battlefield of the mind, Joyce Meyers
The Mom factor, Cloud and Townsend
I give you authority, Charles H Kraft.
25 surprising marriages, William Peterson, Baker bookhouse.
Rich dad poor dad, Robert T. Kiyosaki.
Faith anchored in the unseen, Bill Johnson
Dr. Willard Harley, His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage
http://www.probe.org/content/view/13/72/ Adultery myths
http://www.jewishmag.com/13MAG/HAPPY/happy.htm premarital sex
http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/news/20050322/recipe-for-happiness-in-marriage happy spouse = happy you
http://www.body1.com/news/index.cfm/1/331 happiness in marriage
http://www.lovingexpressions.net , adult nursing
Christian adult nursing relationship, (yahoo group)
Snclist (yahoo group)
Land of milk and honey.com
Note: these adult nursing sites do not support pornography or immoral lifestyles.